Kanji Press

A woman called the Lady of the Middle Councilor served Lady Taikenmon’in.² She cut her hair and received the tonsure after the death of her lady. She moved to the foot of Ogura Hill³ and practiced the Way with a pure heart. Hearing about her, I began to search for her place in the beginning of the ninth month.

After walking along a path hidden by the tall grasses, I finally reached her place. In the bright moonlight I clearly saw the eaves of the house, the hedge and the dew on the flowers among vines and pampas grass. With a rough field in the front and a mountain path by the side, the house appeared very lonely amidst the insects’ songs and the monkeys’ cries in the mountain.

An autumn breeze through the pine twigs and over the hagi leaves softly whispered by her pillow and made the place look even more desolate and lonely.

When I met the lady, she first said to me, “After receiving the tonsure, I missed my lady as I sadly recalled her and the other people. But now I have completely forgotten them and do not lament for any of them. Thanks to the practice of the Way, I have abandoned the joy and grief of secular life.  Even as I am an ignorant woman, I have reached this stage. Someone like you who has practiced the Way for months and years must certainly have a clearer heart.” I was deeply impressed by her remarkable words.

As a wise man has said, “Leaving the joy and grief of the secular life is Zen.” We  try to forget secular delusions, but this is  difficult as many futile ideas arise one after another in our mind. On the contrary, this lady had completely abandoned her delusions. Probably she was able to do this not only on account of her karma in the present life but also because of the merits she had accumulated by practicing virtue in her numerous past lives. Thanks to these merits, she was able to cast off the delusions of this life.

I entered the Way long before she did, and I have devotedly practiced the Way ignoring fame and profit, yet I remain inferior to her. I felt most ashamed and upset as I left her. On my way back, I suddenly realized that feeling annoyed and vexed was due to my failure to abandon secular delusions. I thought of returning to tell her of my feelings but I did not want to disturb her so I helplessly continued on my way down the hill.

Three years later when I heard the lady had fallen seriously ill, and I wanted to visit her. But then Ilearned that she had already passed away in the correct manner; sitting straight upright with her palms joined and facing to the west. I tearfully returned home thinking that she had truly abandoned all delusions.